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| Our happy little family |
On November 6,2015 the birth of my son was life or death
situation for me.
Any parent-to-be can come up with numerous worst-case
scenarios when it comes to the birth of their child. It is natural to have
anxiety about giving birth especially when everyone is offering their horror
stories.
But what happens when the unexpected really does happen?
I have been hesitant about publically discussing this story
but in talking with my midwife, I realized that I NEEDED to share my story. It is
an imprint on my fabric. As November is the month of giving thanks, I cannot
express my thanks to my son Gage Emerson, my 8lb 6oz lifesaver!
My labor started as many do; uncomfortable contractions,
sleepless nights and anxiety that soon our lives were going to CHANGE! We went
to the hospital on Thursday November 5th around 9:30 am and were told
to go walk the mall for two hours (yup went too soon but something in my gut
said we needed to be there). After walking every level of the mall, we went
back and surprise, no progress but the midwives admitted us anyway.
After several hours with little progress, I opted for the
epidural, where I met the other man that saved my life. As my epidural was
placed, the anesthesiologist noticed that my O2 level in my blood was low, 92%.
A normal level for a healthy person (and if you followed my pregnancy you would
know I focused on being at optimal health) is between 98-100%. So I was put on
oxygen, which would increase my O2 level immediately, but it didn’t.
So the question my anesthesiologist wanted answered was WHY?
I was asked question like “have you been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder?” “Have
you ever had numbness in your leg or severe swelling?” “Any instances of shortness of breath or heart racing while at
rest?”. My answer to all, “no”. After
continued persistence from the anesthesiologist the internal medicine physician
on call was consulted, who ordered an x-ray and sonogram of my legs in addition
to more blood draws.
The scary verdict… massive blood clots in my left leg or
deep vein thrombosis (DVT)!
The game plan… place me on blood thinners. There were two
concerns. First, while giving birth the current clots could dislodge and travel
to my lungs (pulmonary embolism). Although blood thinners cannot treat the
current clot is can prevent any new clots from forming. The second, being on
blood thinners during a vaginal delivery has high risk of increased bleeding of
the perineum. At this point, the perinatal neonatal specialist (high risk OB
specialists) were consulted.
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| So blessed to be holding my son |
There was more unfortunate news, the epidural had to be
removed since blood thinners cannot be given while an epidural is in place. I
immediately went into defeat mode “I can’t do this” I cried. All I heard from
the entire room of people (about 7-8 including Kurt and my mother) was “YES YOU
CAN!” The epidural was removed around midnight and it was a waiting game; for
the epidural to wear off, for my labor to progress and for the 4 hour time
lapse so blood thinners could be started.
We didn’t wait long because my water broke and I progressed
from 4cm to 8cm in less than 15 min. So things were expedited. It appeared Baby
K was coming in a hurry all the sudden… As we began to discuss the labor
process I was introduced to the infamous midwife known as “No tear Jerry”. For
those not familiar with child birth, there is a section known as the perineum
(between vagina and anus) that often time tears as the baby is born. Jerry
began prepping me for my un-medicated journey and her approach was very
non-conventional.
I was NOT going to push this baby out! Say what?! No
pushing. Instead Baby K would make his way down the birth canal with the help
of the contractions. When I get to this part of the story, everyone asks “how
do you NOT push?” It’s instinct to push regardless if you have an epidural or
not. I wasn’t given any instruction on how to NOT push but everyone trusted
that my body would do what it needed to.
The OR was completely SILENT except for me screaming, my
amazing no nonsense nurse and Jerry. I cannot tell you exactly how I did it. I
can only say that there was a greater power within me that took over. The
neonatal specialist said she had never seen anything like it; the left side of
my body was completely limp while the right side of my body took all the
pressure and stress. My mother (a total rock star) endured over an hour and a half
of me squeezing her hand (I popped several blood vessels in her hand) and
supporting my right arm. After what seemed like an eternity the first cries of
my precious little angel filled the OR.
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| My first official photo with my little man |
With only a slight tear, the midwife certainly lived up to
her name! As they cleaned up little sir I lay on the OR table dazed, almost an
out of body experience. I was responding to questions but extremely lethargic.
My body however was convulsing uncontrollably and then they moved me from the OR
table to an ICU bed and handed me Gage. No one rushed me, I just held my sweet
sir and kissed him and stared at my perfect savior. Finally, I knew the time
had come where I had to say goodbye to him and head to the ICU while he went to
the nursery. Such a hard thing to do and
the second time I have departed from my newborn child due to complications
(after Lorelai was born she spontaneously popped both her lungs and spent 12
days in the NICU).
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| oh man 6 months of self injections |
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| Where I have to inject myself |
While in the ICU numerous tests were order including CTC
scan, EKG with bubble, endless blood samples, and more. The verdict… the clots
in my leg were not new and had not broken off and traveled to my lungs. I was
placed on heparin finally but then the next concern, how to prevent new clots
from forming long term and was it safe to breast feed while on therapy? After discussion
with the vascular surgeon I decided to do twice daily injections of Lovenox for
a minimum of six months.
As I continue to relive this event in my mind and through
discussion the recurring theme is how blessed I am to be holding my son. My labor
is certainly a case study that will be discussed by not only OB but vascular,
cardiac and anesthesiology departments.
I cannot express my unending gratitude to everyone involved
in this miraculous delivery. It was certainly orchestrated chaos. My son saved
my life. Had we not conceived this little miracle who knows if the blood clots
would ever have been discovered until it was too late to resolve.
Gage thank you so much for coming into our lives when we
needed you the most and did not know it! I LOVE YOU!
